Chapter 49: Morning Brings a Translation
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It was just past midnight when I fell asleep. Eventually, the soft rhythm of Sasha's breathing and the warmth of his body lulled me off. I even slept well. There was a rightness to lying beside him, a rightness which transcended physical attraction. When something is good, I guess you know it's good.
I woke to the sensation of kisses on my face and neck and gentle hands wandering lower. It was a delicious feeling, the stuff of many of my recent dreams. I wanted this to be reality, but if it was a dream, I didn't want to let it slip away. I opened my eyes cautiously. "Yep, this is reality." I thought. In the thin predawn light, I could see a glint of sandy hair, the line of his cheek, a shapely shoulder... His hair was wild from sleep. He looked up briefly and saw me watching him.
"Good Morning." He said. "Did I wake you?" He had that wicked look in his eyes, the one I remembered from that first graveyard practice. It was a half-lidded predator kind of look. His lips curved into a smile which was beautiful to behold and just as wicked. "Do you want me to stop? So you can go back to sleep?"
"It is an hour before I usually get up." I yawned and stretched.
"I'm up already." He informed me, the double entendre plain.
"I can tell. I don't have to be up for an hour. I didn't sleep until late and I'm still plenty tired. I think I'll just go back to sleep." I said with mock seriousness, my eyes belying my words. The last thing I wanted was for him to stop.
"Maybe I won't let you." There was that grin again. "What say I show you what you asked me, at the top of your lungs, at club that day so long ago?"
"I... "
But he stopped me with a kiss. It was a long, slow kiss; soft, then hard, then soft again. His lips wandered in lazy expanding circles over my face and torso. By the time he reached my breasts, the nipples were hard little peaks. I was embarrassed. I have so little body fat that there's nothing there really to look at... but assuredly, the feelings were there. He seemed to like the fact that he could tickle me, for he would nip my belly in sensitive places, which sent spasms of giggles to my lips. There was one place just at the inside of my hip bone that was particularly tender. I writhed as he kissed it. Then he started to do something which I had only heard about in whispers.
All the air just whooshed out of my lungs. "#@!^%(*#!" I thought. My eyes flew open and I blushed clear down to my navel. I scooted up, shocked.
"Did I hurt you?" Sasha asked. His eyes were troubled and earnest concern showed in them. I shook my head. "I surprised you then. I won't hurt you, you know." He looked up into my frightened, cornered face. "You truly didn't know what you said, did you?"
"No. Did I ask... for that?" I said wide eyed.
He smiled. "You say that so innocently! Sometimes I'm amazed at what a child you are." I stiffened. "No, no, I didn't mean that the way it sounded. You are innocent, unspoiled. It's rather refreshing. It's been delightful, touching you, teaching you. You've been such an enthusiastic student."
"That's always been on my report cards." I replied drolly
"It's been an honor too, to be the first."
"How can you tell?"
"I just can. A woman with any experience wouldn't be shocked or frightened by what I attempted."
"She wouldn't?"
"No, she'd have just closed her eyes and enjoyed it."
"How do you know?"
"I had some excellent teachers myself."
"Oh." It made me uncomfortable to think of Sasha with anyone else. Could he have made another woman feel like he made me feel? Could he have loved her?
"You don't like that do you?"
"No... I don't want you to have ever loved anyone but me." I admitted.
"Now you know how I feel about Alexi."
"Don't bring him into this. This isn't about Alexi, it's about you and me." I mentally thanked Alexi for that lesson. This was indeed about Sasha and me.
Sasha sighed, he levered himself upwards in the bed until he was lying beside me again. "Alexi is attractive and virile and as sex starved as I am. He's here with you and I'm not. Don't think it doesn't worry me. I don't want anyone making love to you except me. I don't want any man loving you either. Alexi loves you, and he wants to make love to you. And you, I think, want him too."
"Don't get into this again Sasha. Last time, you tried to make me go to Alexi. I couldn't do it then and he wouldn't do it now."
"He wouldn't?" Sasha was surprised.
"Alexi wants it all. Not just a moment or a night. If he can't have all of me, my love as well as my body, then he doesn't want any. He won't settle for less. He won't be used."
"How do you... You tried didn't you? You tried to seduce him?" Sasha's face fell, what expression was left hardened into anger.
"I thought that you had betrayed me. I felt like everything which bound us together was dust, disintegrated, a lie. I was devastated... and then I was angry, very angry. I'm not made of stone, Sasha, some beautiful statue to be adored and stored on a shelf. I'm warm. I'm human. I need... to be loved. I am, as you put it, sex starved. Wanting Alexi is like breathing some days, but I never... never, never have allowed it to go beyond wanting. I want to be loved, and I want to be loved by you. That's what's right, and anything which isn't right is wrong."
His face softened, relaxing. "I believe you. I'm sorry, darling, you know how crazy it makes me, to think about you with Alexi."
"I recall."
That feral grin was back. "I never did get to finish showing you what you asked for... "
"I should just close my eyes and enjoy it?" I queried nervously.
"Relax. I won't hurt you. You will like it... I promise."
I must admit... I did. I couldn't think about Sasha for days without blushing. I think he could tell, little wisps of my breath kept coming out as whimpers. The warmth, wetness and stimulation made all the difference when he finally came to me. Oh glory! The hell with oneness and emotional satisfaction! I bit his shoulder to keep from screaming. He cried out, but I think it was the blood I tasted rather than any sexual excess.
"So you did like it?" He said, when it was all over and we were basking in the pleasure of sensitized nerves.
"To say the least." I paused. "Was that really what I asked you?"
"Not exactly, but you offered to do something very similar for me."
Text Copyright © 1998-2003 Mary E. Tyler
