Chapter 38: Long Distance Conversation
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"Mama, can you do me a favor, call Sasha and tell him that I'm not allowed to receive calls at the 'skate house.' Nadya Dragon-breathski has hung up on him at least 3 times this week. He probably thinks that I'm angry with him or something. There was a message for me at the rink yesterday. I just haven't been able to call him."
"That sounds serious."
"They're tighter than Wranglers on a cowboy about the phone. I'm over at Yelena's right now."
"Is it going that badly, Elayne?"
"It's okay, I guess, Mama."
"Are you sure?"
"Well, no... not really. The training is really different and ceaselessly frustrating. All we've done is stroke around the ice and do unison excercises. I miss Sasha. Heck, I miss Alexi. I haven't been able to say more than functional skating type words to him since we've been here. It's like every time I get near him, someone pulls me away for one reason or another."
"He seems really stressed. I know he's worried sick about his mama. We haven't heard from her. He's not skating well and he's pulled tight as a fiddle string. I just keep hoping that he won't break."
"Russavina is being hard on him?"
"Not any more than any other coach, it's different, but he knew what to expect from her. She's stressing me out, not him."
"Mikhael Pathanchev then?"
"No Mikhael has been mostly out of the way. He's been civil."
"Then what? Information, Elayne."
"I just don't want to burden you with my problems. I can handle them myself."
"I promise that I won't give you any advice. I won't try to 'fix you.' "
"Well, okay... It's like this, and I knew that it would be... see, I didn't tell you before, but when I went to Chicago, several people came up to me and 'warned' me about Alexi. You know... about his past. I knew about it and I ignored them. Alexi didn't really notice. He was tied up with his family and practicing and the tryouts, but I noticed. He was shunned. The people there knew him well enough not to pull their children out of the way when he walked by but... "
"These people don't." Mama interjected.
"Exactly. They treat Alexi like he's a monster! Little kids run from him. Parents pull their girls out of his way when he walks by. He was almost a little sweet on an adult skater, someone had a little talk with her... she avoids him like the plague. Those same people have been at me."
"What did you tell them?"
"To go to hell."
"That won't solve anything, Elayne."
"I know, but it made me so MAD! It's not their business!"
"Elayne, there is only one thing that can help this... you're not going to like it. Do you want me to tell you?"
"Yes... " Arrgghh.
"Time, Elayne. Time for those people to see Alexi as a person. Time for them to see that he is not a monster. Time for them to see that ... "
"He's not violent?"
"Yes. This isn't the last time you'll have to deal with this. Every interview from now until forever will ask about 'allegations of abuse.' He'll have to handle it on national TV and every time he loses his temper or walks out of a kiss and cry interview, they'll roast him alive. You knew this when you got into it."
"Yeah, I knew. I've been rehearsing that first kiss and cry interview in my head since the beginning. I think I know what I'm going to say... "
"That's good. Will he let you do that talking?"
"I think so. That's not my problem... Alexi is going to break if he doesn't make some friends here. He needs someone to talk to."
"Can you get him into a support group at the local hospital?"
"Not for another month. Don't ask me why, but they only form new groups every other month, like he can just wait!"
"Can he?"
"Mama, he like a covered pot at a high simmer. He may be fine, but then again, he may flip his lid."
"Are you in any danger?"
"I don't think so. He's more likely to break his hand punching a wall than he is to hurt me at this point... but it would be a terrible thing for him to hurt himself. We don't have too many more months before regionals. We can't afford to lose any more time."
"I can only see one solution. You're going to have to be his friend."
"I am."
"Then you'll have to be a closer friend. He is going to need a hand to hold."
"What about Sasha?"
"What about Sasha?" She said." Are you going to stay with that long distance?"
"I love him, Mama."
"I know, baby. Does that get in the way of your being friends with Alexi?"
"I don't know exactly how to say this, but I spend every day with Alexi. He can be a real darling, really trying and absolutely... "
"So you're attracted to him?"
"AKKK! yes. I was going to say 'impossible,' " I admitted. "It's terribly hard to be near him physically. He's very magnetic. I have to maintain some sort of emotional distance."
"Does he see it like that?"
"I don't think so. I can bet he feels... abandoned."
"That's not good."
"No, it's not. I guess I need to find a closer way to relate to him without being... "
"Sexual?"
"Mama!"
"just let him know how you feel."
"He knows."
"That you chose Sasha over him or that you are there for him regardless?"
"Yes and... well, no."
"You need to tell him, Elayne. Especially now that things are difficult. People can sense that you are restrained about him and they distrust that. If you want people to believe that you are not being hurt, then you must not leave a shadow for doubt to hide." I didn't answer. "There is one thing that I can think of that might help... "
"What?"
"Yelena Perenskya believes you?"
"I think so... she's got a 'wait and see' attitude."
"She's a pretty kind hearted person. Go talk to her about Alexi's PR problems. If you can arrange a public reconciliation between the two of them, it might really help. Especially if she is willing to be seen being friends with you both."
"That's going to be hard."
"Alexi won't apologize?"
"He will. He's admitted what he was. I know that he desperately wants her forgiveness. I'm just not sure that she will be able to get over the discomfort that he causes... and the fear. We're all playing the waiting game with Alexi. We're all wondering 'if.' "
"Even you?"
"Even me. I'm not so sure that he is 'cured.' He's living one day at a time violence free... but what happens if he relapses?"
"What happens Elayne?"
"I won't skate with someone who is abusive."
"Even if it means that you'll never make the Olympics?"
"Even if it means that." I affirmed with some difficulty. "I can only skate with Alexi, because he is a person, not a monster. If he's a monster... I can't do it."
"You don't know how happy I am to hear that."
"I can imagine. I'm no one punching bag."
"So Alexi will apologize... Yelena may forgive him. If she does... "
"I may even be able to get Alexi and Mikhael to sign a permanent peace treaty instead of this shaky cease fire. I'm not sure, but it seems like Mikhael will see Alexi with a jaundiced eye forever."
"Could Sasha help? He might be willing to buddy around with Alexi a bit. If people saw that your boyfriend trusts Alexi, they might be more willing to try."
"Sasha and I aren't public. People who know that I came from Newport have already asked me about him. I've said as little as possible. 'He's a famous singles skater, I'm a unknown pairs skater.' Usually does the trick, except it's getting so that I'm not so unknown. Being Alexi Stanachev's partner... that's getting around."
"Are you really going to be ready for the media attention?"
"I hope so, Mama, I hope so."
"We'll all pray for the best. Are you going to be ready for regionals? Are Russavina and Alexi willing to go along with your plan."
"Alexi seems to see the benefit of competing as Americans. We'll have to work on his citizenship, of course... I may have to marry him."
"How is Sasha going to take that?" She asked, all seriousness.
"I'm KIDDING. You can't get citizenship by marriage any more. Alexi already has a green card. So there's no point."
"That's a relief."
"You can say that again. Alexi's not the type for a 'marriage of convenience.' He'd want... "
"Sasha would not go for that!"
"For sure! Russavina seems to be okay with the idea that we don't want to make too big a splash this year. We want to be solidly top 7 at nationals. If we can get that, it'll be a thumbs up for next year. We want to try to make our reputation as the 'artistic' pair. The Steiglets are so young, that they'll get cast as the 'technical' pair. Russavina thinks it's a great idea. The judges bite the 'art' line, hook and sinker. She doesn't realize what Alexi and I have planned for that last year."
"What's that?"
"Mama, let's just say, we're going to raise the ante in a very historic way. If everything goes right even Yelena and Mikhael won't be able to touch us by Salt Lake City."
"What if it doesn't work?"
"There's still Latvian Nationals... and 2006."
Text Copyright © 1998-2003 Mary E. Tyler
